I TOOK 1 VALIUM FOR A 2 VALIUM TRIP

It was clearly my own fault.My husband is a very patient and good natured man.
That being said,I don't like riding in the car with him. Maybe it's my need for control,maybe it's because he drives like an old lady unless I really make him mad. Whatever it is ,we become "THE BATTLING BICKERSONS" as soon as he puts the key in the ignition. There's something else,I think when it is hot out and you know the car is an oven and you know your wife goes nuts when you put her into a hot car,you should hurry the hell up and start the damn car and get it cooled down asap.As you can probably tell, Joe is Mr Laidback and I am Ms STRESSANDHIGHBLOODPRESSURE.It was my idea to take Cady,Christian and Seth to the mts today for a hike. Maybe I didn't make myself clear.Maybe I needed to let him know that I wanted to enjoy the hike not just survive it. We went up the mt and turned off the road to Bailey Canyon where we always go. Instead of stopping where we always do he just kept going. We are on a bumpy, holey, rocky road. Oh,it's also one lane. As we went farther and farther back into the woods we saw alot of cars in the road hoping we had enough room to get around them because they couldn't find a turn around and were now backing down the road. We aren't in Joes truck,we are in my Jeep and it's not a 4x4. I am just waiting to hear the sound of my paint being scraped off on the side of the mountain as we try to get around these fools who have left us very little room to pass. Everyone in our vehicle smiles as we eek by, I snarl.By now Joe is just flying up this rotten road and acting like he has a plan.I see several places that look pretty nice with grassy meadows and flowers. We ain't stoppin there. At some point the road is now going back downhill.Did I mention that the entire time I am holding my head and feel like I may hurl at any moment and bitching just a little.(i never bitch just a little)I am now wondering if we were to get stuck or lost just how far Joe would have to hike to get reception on his cell. At last out in the middle of the woods where we have seen no other cars for a while,he finds a place and stops. This place is were you would drive back into if you really wanted to be left alone and just camp in peace.You can imagine how happy those people were when we drove up and stopped about 50 yards from their campsite. The only place to hike was up the side of a mountain.We all found a walking stick and headed out.I wanted it to be fun,I really did. As everyone else trotted ahead I lagged behind to take a pic or 2.It was a pretty steep incline and I got madder at Joe with each step. The forest rangers had been busy clearing that area of some living and dead trees and it was solid downed trees and dead branches we were trudging up.If you fell you may easily have a branch pierce your chest. When I caught up with them at the top I couldn't take it anymore and told them we were leaving for a more hiker friendly place. We picked our way back down the hill got into the Jeep had not made it 5 feet when Seth yelled "Grandma,my root beer".I had no idea that he had a full can of soda in his hand as we got in the car.It was now upside down in his crotch like a small root beer lake.I grabbed my flannel shirt and stuffed it in his lap and announced we were going home as Seth was soaked. Half way down the mountain Joe decided to turn off the highway and take the back road down. It was gravel but had 2 lanes and not many holes.It was a pretty drive and when we stopped to take a pic the kids were thrilled that way down the sheer drop off they could see the rotting carcass (i am not going to look that word up for spelling errors)of a poor deer that had badly misjudged the steepness of the hillside. We finally made it home and I just can't wait for next week-end. If all else fails we can always go back and check on the dead deer.(okay,I couldn't sleep till I looked up carcass.)

CAN'T STOP THOSE PICTURES

I know I use too many photos. I don't know how not to. It's how I communicate.
We had such a great week-end. The boys just went home.They want to do it again next week. We got up and went to church this morning and somehow we weren't late. I am always late.I got married twice with wet hair. Joe plays drums in the band so he was already there. We were singing our way down the road. I know it's Sunday and we were going to church but when the radio came on and Nirvana was playing,,we just left it. Seth was into his ipod and singing his own tunes. I have this rebel thing about being a christian and music.I have lots of good cds by christian bands. And if I feel like it I play them. I refuse to act one way at church and then change as I leave the parking lot. I know of people that felt they had to throw out all of the rock music.I am not one of them. I may be screwed up but at least I don't lie about it. Anyhow,that's why we pulled into the church lot with music blaring and singing our hearts out.We had fun and we sang just as loud when we sang praise and worship songs. Am I going to hell? I don't think so. GOD IS GOOD!

AND THE WEEK-END WENT SINGING BY

We have Seth(5) and Christian(11) till tomorrow eve.It's been a while since they stayed over. It feels like home again when the house is full of kids. Once upon a time there were 10 people living here and just 1 bathroom. The good ol days.
Today we went to Christian's foot ball game, his team lost.
Brought both boys home with us and did yard work. They think it's a big treat to come out here and do chores.
Cady is almost 16 and Chritch is 11. He lived with us for several years when he was little so he and Cady are like brother and sister.When they get together they has the mostest fun. Heres a pic of the 2 of them. Cady is fixing his old bike for him and he is trying to make a fire like Tom Hanks in Castaway.We grilled steaks, Seths favorite dinner, and watched "THE LION THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE".I decided to leave the mess till after church. Geez,I hate knowing that is waiting for me.
I know this isn't too exciting but this is it folks!

IT'S A SOCK THING

This is Gage,he is sick and angry. He likes to take off his socks and then put them on his hands and then put the shoes on them too. Being under the weather he wasn't able to use his already socked up hand to put on the other sock. At one point he got so mad that he bit his own arm. I could have helped him but I was running around looking for my camera.

THE ALAMO HAS NO BASEMENT

Gage had a touch of the flu thats been making the rounds this week.
He was in a funny little mood and tended to break out in tears for no apparent reason. After many hours of holding him while he cried and told me "Gamma,I sad", my daughter Heather called and suggested a dose of "PEE WEE HERMAN" might just do the trick. She was right. Because I am the mom of 5 kids who all loved "PEE WEE",I have seen P.W.'s BIG ADVENTURE" many many times. No really, many times. Three times today and 4 times yesterday.Tuesday and Wednesday we watched "BUDDY".In those 2 days we watched "BUDDY" 7 times. Seem a bit too much? I thought so too. Gage loves monkeys and even though the film is about a gorilla,it was close enough. The ending is a tear jerker but gives you that happy ending we all love. Since it is based on a true story and after spending so much time watching it, I got interested and thought I would look up the real story on the web.The true ending is such a sad and depressing tale I don't want to watch the damn thing again.

ASPENCADE

Every September hundreds of bikers show up for a big rally.I have never been big on bikes but who doesn't love the way the ground shakes when a group of HARLEYS fly by? It's not as big as Sturgis but there are alot of bikers that ride in each year.

BALLOONS

We got up before dawn to see the balloons air up and take off. It was worth the loss of sleep.Too much water to have it at White Sands this yr.Ater the balloons we went to breakfast and then to church. As soon as the last prayer was said we took off and picked up grandkids and headed up to Ruidoso to ASPENCADE 2006. Will post lots of pics and spare you from the million words.

because i am lazy

i like to call it tired but maybe it's just lazy.i have done nothing all week except run back and forth to town and watch gage.i haven't even finished cleaning the rug where gage spilled a vanilla shake yesterday. i was only inches away from catching it but alas,i did not make it. i never even posted pics from gages birthday last friday..bad gamma oh good,the wind is beginning to blow.keep praying the very tall tree that grows almost in the creek doesn't come down un us due to the ground being soggy from all the rain.supposed to have the balloon races out at white sands this week-end but now its been moved into town because of all the rain at the sands. seems dangerous due to all the power lines and every year in albuquerque they have some close calls or bad mishaps. have never been to the big ballon fiesta in albq. the place is too violent for us small town folk. they can have the place. if cady gives me my pc tonite maybe i can think of something to say.

Ample make this bed.
Make this bed with awe.
In it wait till judgement breaks
Excellent and fair.

Be it's mattress straight
Be it's pillow round
Let no sunrise's yellow noise
Interrupt this ground.

by Emily Dickinson

THIS IS ME

I have a million things to get done so I am going to post a couple pics and come back later. I wrote in a previous post that "I am not my hair". I want to be able to let you know me, or try to give an idea of "me". Well,I may not be my hair but I surely am my house. Today I cut some roses and put them in an old mason jar and set them in the livingroom. As I looked around the room I realized that this house is Joe and I. We love old stuff and every nook and cranny is filled with something. Every inch of wallspace is covered. Looking around at our stuff is looking at us. So here we are.OKAY,THIS POST IS ALL ABOUT THE PICTURE,BLOGGER ISN'T INTO PICS TONIGHT SO I WILL POST AND COME BACK LATER AND SEE IF THE MOOD HAS CHANGED.

AND THERE IS NO MORE SMILE

Joe is no longer able to eek out a smile.He is sore and tired and in need of help.I cannot climb a ladder I am not one of those gals that can do this type of work.I can make jam, birth a baby,and clean a toilet,but I don't know a thing about constuction. Something tells me this is gonna be a long day.

GAGES BIRTHDAY

Here's my boys with their boys.

AT OUR HOUSE TODAY

The roof is coming along. No friends from church showed up to help. Kinda bugs me. Joe is THE guy who helps everyone from computers, cars, bat removal,plumbing and you name it. He did have help from a very unlikely place. Our so-called neighborhood. Help from "THE HOOD".I try not to have any dealings with anyone who lives near us.I had to edit my remarks about them because as bad as they are,they are people too and it's not right to refer to anyone that way.I would have removed what I said right after I posted it and read it but blogger closed me out.Ha,serves me right! I am not proud to say that I talk this way about people and then go to church.I am proud to say that I do pray for them.But it's kind of a selfish prayer because I don't think I really care about them ,I just want them to change because they make our lives so awful sometimes. Alot of the time. Today one of the trailor people that actually works for a living (as opposed to getting checks from welfare), saw Joe working alone and offered a hand.He worked all day and said if he got rained out in the mts tomorrow that he would be back.It was such a nice thing and it made me think. I have to be a nicer person. ya know "W.W.J.D."He wouldn't talk like I do about those people.You see, we live in a house on 1 acre of land with lots of big trees and a creek that runs thru the back.It's a little old country house.I call it LASSIES HOUSE cuz it reminds me of the old house on that show where Timmy lived with Lassie. Cute but in need of lots of work.We used to enjoy bon fires every week-end. Playing horse shoes and volley ball. Along one side of our property is the trailor park. We had to stop using our yard because of the drunken fights and lewd behavior.One night a drunk man got hit with a shovel and then as he lay there in the road bleeding, someone drove around the corner and ran over him.( we found out about this when we ran out to see what the sirens were for)Meth lab bust, domestic violence,child abuse,you name it we either have it now or had it once.I just wanted you to have some idea why I use the terms I do when describing my neighbors. Things are not bad here right now.I am pretty sure nobody is selling drugs. The good thing is that most of the people here don't have kids anymore as the state has taken them all. My best friend is the lawyer for CYFD and they know her so sometimes she has to sneak to my house. Anyway,I felt that I wanted to tell something about myself ,so there you go. TMI probably.
Actually I really intended to post pics of some of my babies that came over today. blogger is no mood for pics today,

LIFE IN THE SWAMP

Thank God the rain took the day off.Joe took the rest of the week off to put a new roof on our waterlogged house. If it rains tonight we may be in trouble.He just finished spudding so we are naked up there. Except for the huge tarp Joe is putting on the roof for the night. Cady got up for school this AM and found all her clothes in her closet were soaked. What a treat.We thought we had covered all bases Sunday night.Didn't think to look in her closet.Joe has a friend from church helping him in the morning.Geez,sounds like Cady or Joe just fell thru the roof. I blew it all off last night and baked some pumpkin bread and pretended everything was fine. Sounds like a plan for tonight too.

CHRISTIAN

My grandson Christian just called me in tears. He just heard about Steve Irwin. He asked me if I could bring him our giant CROC HUNTER puzzle.He and I spent hours putting it together last winter. Someone with such a huge presence leaves a big blank spot when they die. Doesn't death just suck? And don't I have such a way with words.Lots of sad kids today.

BEST LITTLE WOODSTOCK IN TEXAS

With all the crapola this week-end I almost forgot about this. About a million years ago this Labor Day 5 friends and I set off without permission (I was 16) for a 3 day festival in Texas.My parents wouldn't let me go to Albuquerque that past winter to see LED ZEPPELIN. They didn't understand that I had to see them.Part of my hearing loss today I am certain is from the hours spent with headphones turned up way too far bouncing around to "DAZED AND CONFUSED" or the ever popular "STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN". We took almost no money and had no real plan.The "Hog Farm" fed us everyday.Bands played at the freestage in the campground.We made friends with people who had vendor passes and let us get in for free each day.We bummed money from all the tourists who brought the family out to see the hippies.We spent most of the time high on acid.(hey,it was the 60's man) I can't imagine anything like this today.We did all take care of each other.I would never want my kids to do such a thing but for me it is one of my favorite memories.

PLEASE GOD,ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE RAIN

We made it through last night.Ants went someplace during the night and gone was good enough for me at that time.While watching water collect under the paint on the ceiling in the kitchen, I noticed that the ants were making a come back.I was proud that I had not had a meltdown over over the poop and loss of our rug and the many leaks in the kitchen.When I came in my room an hour ago and saw the water on the floor, that was the final straw.But not the final leak. Heard Joe yell "aw fuck",he found another leak. Actually it found him.This one is in the hall.As I type I am listening to the steady drip drip drip from 3 rooms now.I have sat and cried,prayed and cussed. Still the rain cometh.I am afraid by tomorrow night we will have serious damage that we cannot afford to repair.Joe has done everything he could to patch up the leaks when the rain has stopped for a minute here and there. Last week it seemed he had patched it all and it was done.I am trying to tell myself how fortunate we are to even have a home.There are many around here and all over the state that watched their houses float away. I think I shall get a valium and a glass of white wine and finish "MY POSSE DON'T DO HOMEWORK".

SOME ENCHANTED EVENING---NOT!

Joe and I did something we never do anymore,we went out together.Cady had a babysitting job so we decided to go up to the mts. to the village of Cloudcroft to enjoy the street dance and whatever else they had going on for Labor Day weekend.We had dinner at the Western Bar and had such a nice time just talking for a change.It was rainy and beautiful up there.Clouds coming right to the ground. After dinner we went out to the ski place to see our friend Bo Rivers play.Turns out it was a tickets in advance dinner and music affair. Bo had forgot to tell us that.Regardless,we ended up sitting at a table right in front and had a great time. Laughed and enjoyed most of the ride home except for the part where I got freaked out driving in the rain and clouds and praying one of those huge boulders that always come down the mountain during a rainstorm didn't crush our truck or send us off the cliff. Joe got mad at me for nagging him to slow down (he was doing the speed limit but I think he could have slowed down just to make me feel better) and so I just stopped talking which also irked him. By the time we got home everything was good again. Joe walked in the front door ahead of me and yelled "oh shit,don't come in". Dog poop the consistancy of pancake batter was everywhere.It also happens to be the same color as our living room rug.That same rug that Joe is at this very moment ripping up and dragging out the front door.There was no way to clean that crap up.I tried. guess I will be getting that new braided rug I sorta wanted but didn't want to spend the money on.While I was cleaning the poop off the kitchen floor I noticed a few ants.I looked up and saw that the ceiling was and is covered with sleeping ants.I knew at some point the rain was going to drive them inside. CRIPES! Joe and I were yelling at each other about how to get the poop rug out,I felt he was over reacting and that has always been my job. I decided to come in here and blog a while. Ya know,the entire evening I kept thinking (and taking pictures)about posting about the nice time we had. We have 2 dogs, do you think it could have been the little Jack Russell that got the trots? Hell no. It was our big Ridgeback.In 8 years he has never pooped in the house. Poor boy had tummy trouble.I guess I will venture into the livingroom and see how it looks. This is one of the reasons why everyone wants to be me! I freakin love my life.